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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30104817">Out</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elmosayscookie28/pseuds/Elmosayscookie28'>Elmosayscookie28</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Larries - Fandom</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Fluff and Smut, Hurt/Comfort, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 23:34:32</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>16,350</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30104817</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elmosayscookie28/pseuds/Elmosayscookie28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Larry Stylinson fanfic about their everyday life kinda. Not fully every day but from Feb 2020 and throughout 2020. Don't know how to explain it so enjoy.<br/>English is NOT my first language so bear with me when the grammar or whatever gets bad and even horrible. I apologize beforehand in case.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b> <em>Chapter 1</em> </b>
</p>
<p>8:00 pm</p>
<p> </p>
<p>My toes curl at the cold water ending just above my ankles.</p>
<p>We're finally rehearsing after a full day of watching every other artist rehearse. We couldn't rehearse until 45 minutes ago because of the pianos and all the water. We've been going through how everything's going to work tomorrow for the last hour and I'm completely exhausted. I just want to go home and curl up in bed after a hot cuppa. I've had one rough week and it’s sucking my energy no matter how much coffee I drink, exercise, meditate or rest. I've been trying to keep myself positive and avoid the harsh truth that I'll never get to see her smile again. She was one of my closest friends and I never thought that day would come so soon. </p>
<p>'Harry?' A voice grabs my attention. </p>
<p>'Sorry, what?' </p>
<p>'Are you ready to sing? We need to do a soundcheck.'</p>
<p>Taking a deep breath and answering as happy as I could 'Yes'. </p>
<p>I close my eyes and start to sing. </p>
<p>"I'm in my bed and you're not here…'</p>
<p>When I came to the chorus right before the bridge my voice broke. I hadn't realized the silent tears streaming down my face until now. My eyes were still closed. I just couldn't tonight, I was tired and sad, but I took a deep breath and laughed while saying sorry. </p>
<p>This time I looked down at Mitch who spoke with his eyes. 'You need to rest' 'It's okay to be sad'</p>
<p>His eyes spoke more than a mouth could ever. I raised my hand a little asking for a break. I looked down into the water seeing my own reflection. I didn't look like the happy and charming Harry everyone knew me as. Me included. </p>
<p>After a while of closed eyes and thinking a voice broke my trance. I know that voice. It's him, he's really here. I looked up and there he was right in front of me. </p>
<p>I study his face for a short while. </p>
<p>'Haz.' It's almost like a quiet whisper inside my head. I can't tell if it's real or not.</p>
<p>I can hear voices around me, probably speaking to me but I can't move. Seeing him caused the chain on my emotions to shatter into a million pieces. I probably look emotionless but every single emotion there's out there is running through my me. </p>
<p>He starts walking towards the side of the stage where the steps are. My heart is starting to beat faster and faster as my eyes follow the yellow sweater he's wearing. My sweater. The one I left at his apartment 2 weeks ago. </p>
<p>He's standing a foot away from me and I completely drown in his crystal blue eyes. </p>
<p>'Hi.'</p>
<p>I collapse into his arms, hugging him tighter than ever. This week has been an absolute nightmare, first almost getting killed and then Caroline's death. I can feel tears burning in my eyes but I squeeze my eyes tight not letting them fall just yet.</p>
<p>'Hey haz,' he's whispering in my ear. </p>
<p>'Do you want to take a break?' He asks. </p>
<p>I just shake my head, not trusting my voice. </p>
<p>'Haz, you're going to work yourself too much, a break won't hurt, we can have a short break and then go through the song and then go home, ok?' </p>
<p>It actually sounds quite nice, I nod my head and his grip loosens up. My mind protests at the loss of contact but I straighten up a little bit and try and breathe normally to avoid having a breakdown. </p>
<p>'Can we just have a short break?' I ask. My voice a bit shaky, great, way to go Styles. </p>
<p>Tom, one of the soundcheck guys, seems to think about it for a few moments before saying ok to 15 minutes. </p>
<p>Starting to move I remember the water I've been standing in, now looking down at Louis feet, he's in his socks, when did he take his shoes off? </p>
<p>We start walking off stage, drying our feet before walking backstage to my dressing room. The moment I close the door Louis turns to me with quite a stern look. </p>
<p>'What is it?' </p>
<p>'Tell me right now why you're pushing yourself that much..' </p>
<p>'I just-', I try to come up with a good explanation but there just isn't one. I can feel the tears starting to burn again. This time I just look down at my feet, almost as if I’m  embarrassed, am I?  Louis' tiny little feet come into sight and a hand is placed on my chin, bringing it upwards slowly. We lock eyes and the tears start to run down my cheeks, Louis just looks at me with empathy and pulls me into another tight hug. I sob and start to full on cry, it usually doesn't happen very often but this week has been a mess and I just need some support and reassurance that everything's gonna be alright. Louis starts stepping backwards and when the cough meets his legs he sits down and shifts so he's laying on his back, I push myself down a little so my head's just tucked under his chin. I'm still pressed in his neck crying and just letting everything go. </p>
<p>'Shh, shh, shh, it's gonna be alright, I promise'</p>
<p>I cry into his shoulder a bit and just let him hold me while whispering and kissing my head. After a while he starts stroking my hair and running his fingers through my curls, the sensations making me doze off. </p>
<p>I wake sometime later to hushed voices, I immediately recognize Louis voice among Mitch and someone else's. </p>
<p>'Can't he just do it tomorrow instead, he's emotionally drained and a hell of a week. Just let him rest'</p>
<p>'But we need to rehearse to make sure everything's good for tomorrow'</p>
<p>'It has worked for everyone else'</p>
<p>'Yes but Harry has a water stage and water coming out in various places, we need to make sure everything works with the water'</p>
<p>'Don't you do that tomorrow?' </p>
<p>'Both today and tomorrow'</p>
<p>'Fine, a quick one and then he needs to go home and rest'</p>
<p>‘I actually have a voice’ I break the irritated tension in the room and made all eyes land on me.</p>
<p>‘Baby, you're up! I guess you heard most of that.’</p>
<p>‘Some but not everything, anyways, I'll just rehearse the song and then I'll go home if that’s okay’</p>
<p>The staff and tech people nodded their heads and then walked out of the room. </p>
<p>The band also left, I guess they were all arguing about me going home. Wonder why Mitch got quiet after I woke up. </p>
<p>Still laying on Louis, only now I'm laying with my head in his lap with his hands running through my hair. </p>
<p>‘Haz, you don't have to, you know it'll work out perfectly tomorrow’</p>
<p>‘Yeah but you know, just to make sure. Just one time and then we'll go home. It's dark too so we can go together.’</p>
<p>‘Yeah, we're going to yours tonight though, I miss your bed’ </p>
<p>‘I know, thank my mum for that bed, she found it.’</p>
<p>‘Alright let's get up’ Louis slowly gets up from the couch and walk over to my bag and pulls out a grey hoodie. </p>
<p>‘Harold?’ He asks with slight concern latched to his voice. </p>
<p>‘Yes?’ </p>
<p>‘You sure you're okay?’ </p>
<p>‘Yes Lou, as good as I can be, we can talk when we get home’. </p>
<p>‘Ok’ </p>
<p>The slightly crooked brow gave him away, I know he doesn’t believe me fully but I don’t have the strength to talk about my week. I smile and peck his lips before we walk out of the dressing room and onto the stage. I do a thumbs up to the crew and close my eyes. I push myself through the song without crying. After I’m done the band and I talk a little bit about tomorrow and other things while Louis grabs our things. I quickly thank everyone for the day and a short goodbye to the band, making a mental note to try and talk to Mitch tomorrow if possible. </p>
<p>On the ride home and notice, Louis being very quiet and spaced out. Usually, he loves to talk and tell me about his day or something that made him happy. </p>
<p>‘Lou?’ </p>
<p>He snaps out of his trance and shoots me a smile, I can see it’s half forced but decide not to mention it. </p>
<p>‘Yeah, Haz?’</p>
<p>‘U okay?’</p>
<p>‘Yeah, I'm great, why?’</p>
<p>‘Don't know u seem a little off’ I hesitate but </p>
<p>‘Just a lil tired, that's all’ He smiles but his eyes tell me that’s not the full truth. </p>
<p>‘Okay’ I shift my gaze back to the dim-lit road.  </p>
<p>We roll up to my gate and the doors open letting us inside. Louis drives up to the front of the house and stops outside instead of going into the garage. I sigh quietly and slowly get out of the car. I’m completely exhausted and everything I want is a shower and going to sleep but I know that isn’t gonna happen... </p>
<p>Something was gonna spark between me and Lou tonight. I had a thought of it being about earlier today when he had argued with the tech guys.</p>
<p>I walk inside and kick my shoes off before going directly up to our bedroom and into the bathroom. The warm water almost lulls me to sleep, cutting it short to prevent myself from falling asleep I step out. I’m gonna have to shower tomorrow anyways. With a fluffy towel wrapped around my waist and my hair up in a scrunchie I pad back into our bedroom. I throw on a pair of boxers, a pink sweatshirt and running shorts, I keep the scrunchie in my hair. Walking out of the bedroom I hear the TV running. </p>
<p>I decide to go downstairs even though I’m practically sleepwalking. I simply can’t go to sleep not knowing what's bothering Lou. Finding the kettle  already on the stove I pick a mug and make myself a cuppa. I pad into the living room where Louis’s laying and watching some weird TV show.</p>
<p>‘No footie?’</p>
<p>‘Nah, no one's playing tonight.’ </p>
<p>‘U sure ur ok Lou?’</p>
<p>‘Yeah just a lil tired’</p>
<p>I sit by his feet placing my cup at the antique coffee table.</p>
<p>- Come ere haz. Louis opens his arms and I lay on his chest, I press my nose into his neck as he starts rubbing gentle circles on my back making my eyelids droop. Today has been stressful and tiring but my mind's still preoccupied with Louis, I have a feeling he won't tell me what his mind's clogged with which makes me a little queasy. I decide to ask him about it before I fall asleep in his arms. </p>
<p>‘Lou?’ I ask, my voice a bit thick with sleepiness. </p>
<p>‘Yeah?’</p>
<p>‘What was the argument about?’</p>
<p>‘Nothing to worry about Haz’</p>
<p>‘But Mitch practically stormed out of the room as soon as I woke up, did I let anyone down?’</p>
<p>‘No luv you didn't. The argument was just about you resting’</p>
<p>‘But why are you so upset about it?’</p>
<p>*Silence*</p>
<p>‘I- ‘ *sigh*</p>
<p>‘Harry, can I ask you something?’</p>
<p>‘Yeah sure go ahead’</p>
<p>‘Do you think Mitch might like you more than as a friend?’</p>
<p>His question startles me and I just tense up. The words get stuck in my mouth. Mitch is together with Sarah and I couldn't be happier for them. Mitch and I are only best friends and nothing more.</p>
<p>‘Harry?’</p>
<p>‘Yeah, sorry, Uhm, no Lou, there's nothing between me and Mitch, he has a girlfriend’</p>
<p>‘Doesn't mean he doesn't feel anything for you’</p>
<p>‘He wouldn’t be together with her if he has feelings for me Lou’</p>
<p>‘You can have feelings for two people at the same time'</p>
<p>‘But you’re with me and not him, plus he knows we're married'</p>
<p>‘Maybe that's why he hasn't told you yet’ I breathe heavily signaling I’m tired and not putting up a fight.</p>
<p>‘Just drop it please’ </p>
<p>Louis gets quiet and stops rubbing circles on my back. I keep my eyes closed and press myself further into his neck.</p>
<p>‘Have you ever had feelings for him?’ He suddenly blurts out into the silence. </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>Chapter 2</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>February</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Suddenly I just sit up, take my tea and leave him on the sofa, I quickly walk the stairs up to our bedroom, placing my teacup on my bedside table and sitting down on the bed before the questions cloud my already drained out and tired head. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>'Did he really just ask me that?' Thoughts run circles around my head and I can feel the irritation and sadness building up. I swallow hard and knot my fists in the sheets before getting up again and walking to the bathroom. I start a shower again to prevent a headache and my tense body to calm down. The water cascades down my back and my muscles relax. Suddenly two small hands creep their way up my back, kissing between my shoulder blades, I close my eyes and tilt my head back before leaning my hands against the wall and dropping my head forward. The tears are burning behind my tired eyelids, soon enough they’re running down my cheeks and blend with the water. Louis’s hands snake around to my stomach and his chest leans further against my back. We stand there quietly for a long time before I take a shaky breath turning around in his arms. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Louis’s POV</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He turns around and I look at his hidden face. His cheeks covered in a thin layer of salty tears and water, his eyes are closed but I can see the tiredness behind.  His breath is shaky and his shoulders slumped, his tired defeated body tugs in my chest but I stay strong in order to fix my mess. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Haz, please look at me baby’ I speak softly, rubbing his hips a bit. But he doesn’t react. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Hazza, please’</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I keep begging him with my whole heart to just look at me or say something. I know I hurt him and I made a mistake. Damn, why did my jealous side have to strike today. I know he’s exhausted and sad and I of course had to slip up. But my narcissistic side had to know.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Harry?’ Still no reaction. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Harry please, I’m dying over here’ Finally he lifts his head and opens his eyes. I rarely see him as upset as he is now and I can’t help but look up through my lashes with sad eyes. I know I don’t have the right to look at him this way but I can’t help it. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Suddenly he chuckles a little quietly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘You’re dying, are you kidding me? YOU asked that question. YOU questioned my love for you again! AND on top of that, YOU are being selfish as usual!’ I flinch slightly at the harsh words he spits at me. I know he doesn’t mean to sound that harsh but when he gets really upset he gets sad and irritated. Mostly at himself for letting anger take over his senses. I try squeezing at his sides affectionately to tell him I’m alright. But that of course only leads to nothing, not an angry sorry. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Shit. I really fucked up this time. I look up and down nervously before meeting his eyes again. Only this time they’re empty and hollow, he’s shutting me out. I plead with my eyes but it’s no good. He sighs before stepping out of the shower, grabbing a towel, and leaving the bathroom. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Fuck, I curse myself but decide not to go after him, It’ll only end in a possible screaming match which won’t end well. I use the rest of the shower to wash my hair and body before stepping out, grabbing a white fluffy towel and slowly drying myself off. I throw the towel in the hamper and walk into our empty bedroom, grabbing a pair of boxers, shorts, and a sweatshirt. I get dressed and sit down on the bed, a million thoughts running through my and me quietly cursing my selfish ego over and over again. Suddenly the thought strikes me, he has a performance tomorrow and a very long night. I scramble for my phone but I can’t find it. I left it on the sofa table downstairs of course. I sigh and stand up, walking out of the bedroom and out in the hallway, I look over the railing to see if Harry’s there but no luck. I pad down the stairs into the living room and spot my phone on the table. I quickly pick it up and it reads 11:30 pm, fuck he needs to sleep for tomorrow and this is the absolute last thing he needs. If I’m not screwing things up again, what’s new. ‘I need to find him now’. I make my way to the kitchen but no luck, in a matter of minutes I’ve looked through the entire house but can’t find him. I know he’s old enough to help himself but my heart is in my throat and I can’t help but worry. I slump down on the edge of the couch and tears start to fall. “Not now” mentally slapping my cheeks for concentration, I take a deep breath and compose myself. I need to think clearly, there’s no time for panic. ‘What would Harry do when he’s upset?’ </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Of course, he’d call his sister or mom, only the problem of location still remains. Car. I rush to the hall and put on a pair of slippers before opening the door to the rain heavily falling down. I huff and walk out towards the Range Rover in front of the house. I walk as fast as my feet will carry me, I’m pretty much drenched by the time I make it to the car. My heart drops when I realize it’s empty and I can feel the tears threatening to fall again. I decide to take a walk around the house in case Harry might be somewhere. I start walking around the mansion and it’s certainly not a short powerwalk. ‘Damn Harry why’d you have to buy such a huge mansion, I get around the front of the house and make my way to the tennis court. Not there, I slump my shoulders and keep walking, I’m shivering by now but Harry’s more important than having a sore throat tomorrow, besides it’s not me who’s singing. I walk a little faster, checking every corner of the backyard but still no sign. At this point, I’m sure I’m gonna have a panic attack or maybe a heart attack from how fast my heart is beating. My tears have started to fall down with the rain but I don’t care anymore, I might have destroyed us and it might be the end for a while. Or perhaps I’m overreacting, all I know is that I fucked up real bad and I would take it back anytime. At this point, I’m screaming for Harry but the heavy rain drowns out my voice. My throat is sore and my screams desperate. I’ve searched every corner of the house and the garden. His mansion’s huge and so is his garden but still no sign. I go inside to take a breath, my crying and sobbing echoing throughout the entire house. Yet again I push my panicked self out in the rain, this time I walk to the gate and down the street hoping to find him sitting close by or maybe running. I walk down the street furiously looking for a sign but none. I make my way back to the house, still screaming for Harry to come back, my voice is weak and no one can probably hear me in the rain. I drag my heavy feet behind me as I walk back to the gate, suddenly I hear my name. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Lou!’</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I turn around and my heart drops at the sight, a few meters away is a drenched and emotionless Harry. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Harry’ I whisper. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Harry’ my voice breaks and fresh tears run down my cheeks. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Before I know it I run as fast as I can down the street and straight into him. He’s cold and slightly shivering but I don’t care. I press myself into his neck and hug him as tightly as I can still sobbing and crying my eyes out. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He doesn’t return the hug but he doesn’t shrug me off either. My weak knees buckle under me and I fall to the ground, I land on my knees but shift so I can sit on my butt hugging my knees to my chest. By this time I’m probably running a fever, possible pneumonia but nothing can really burn away the relief of him standing in front of me. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Louis please stand up’</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘I- I can’t’</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I  try to move but my body just won’t oblige. I struggle for a bit before sitting down with an irritated huff.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Yes you can, please just stand up, I don’t want you to get pneumonia’</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘I don’t care’ I sob. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Maybe you don’t but I do, so can you please stand up’</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Can you carry me, please?’</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Silence. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Yes, just please stand up for me’</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Thank you’</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I struggle and almost fall back down but I make it standing right in front of him. I don’t dare to look at his face, the shame threatening to push me down.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Ok, hmm, I’ll lift you up, and then you’ll wrap your legs around me, okay?’</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Okay.’ I nod.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I carefully wrap my arms around his neck, my eyes still locked on the ground.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Okay on three, jump and wrap your legs around me’</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I just nod, not trusting my voice to function properly.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Here we go, one, two, and three.’ </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Pushing with all the strength I’ve got left, I jump up and wrap my legs around his waist, he hikes me up a little higher, holding my thighs tight. I lock my ankles together and keep my arms around his neck. I bury my head at the side of his head. He starts walking back towards the gate, I’m almost lulled to sleep by his walk but I force myself to keep awake. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘You’re so strong baby’ I whisper in his ear. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘I’m so incredibly sorry I hurt you, I’m so insecure but I need you to know that I love you so much’ </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘I love you, I love you, I love you’ I whisper in between lightly pecking under his ear.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>We’re both extremely exhausted but I can’t sleep knowing that I upset him. We promised each other to always love each other and not go to sleep fighting. I also know this won’t solve anything but it might help and I’m willing to give it a chance. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Harry I know you won’t say anything back and you don’t have to, I understand if you’ll need space for a while, but I’m so sorry for hurting you and I shouldn’t have said what I did. Just please don’t shut me out, you can shout and be angry with me just please don’t leave me in silence’ In all our 10 years together I never thought we’d stay together this long, not because we don’t love each other but because I suck at biting my tongue and just let things go. I still wake up every morning wondering how the hell I got so lucky, I do feel like I don’t deserve him but there just isn’t anyone better out there for me. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Suddenly our crotches rub against each other and my breath hitches. I feel Harry tense up for a second but relax just as fast. I consider doing it on purpose again. But first I open my eyes and lift my head, a couple of metres and we’ll be inside. I decide to do it. I grind down on him and this time a groan escapes his lips. ‘Lou’ Heat starts to pool in my midriff. I do it again and this time he almost stops before groaning loudly in my ear. He walks up the stairs swiftly and he stops when my back is against the door. This time he grinds against me and we both moan. I try slowly rocking but he grips my thighs hard shaking his head no. ‘Lou, wait we need to get inside’ I nod and press myself tight around him like a koala bear. As he walks inside I fight myself to grind, craving some friction against my growing erection. I feel his semi-hard against my thigh and I start panting in his ear. Experimentally I nibble his ear and his grip on my thighs tightens. I gasp at the almost painful palms on my thighs. I never realized he’s this strong, sure I know he’s strong but it still catches me off guard every single time.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Loueh, I’ll walk us to the shower ok?’ I nod my head trying to focus on something else. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He walks us up to the bedroom and into the shower, he pushes me against the tiles and turns on the shower. I gasp as the hot water hits my body. I suppress a moan as I finally grind against his hard-on, he moans loudly in my ear. But stills me again, gripping even harder at my thighs. ‘I need you to get your clothes off, can you do that?’ I shake my head still fighting to keep myself wrapped around his body as the water makes him slippery. ‘Ok, I’ll do it for you, can you unwrap yourself and stand on the floor for me?’ His voice is so tender I could melt away. ‘Okay,’ I whisper. I unwrap my legs from his waist but keep my arms around his neck. I press my face into his neck and focus on standing up and breathing normally. He drags my wet shorts and boxers down my legs and I step out of them. He tugs at the hem of my sweater and I release my arms from his neck. He quickly peels the ice-cold sweater from my chest and I shiver at the change in temperature. I nervously bite my lip as he undresses and kicks our clothes away from us. When he’s done I finally look up into his eyes and hesitate before stretching out my arms as a child wanting to be held. Harry obliges and I return to wrap myself around him. He pushes me against the tiles and grinds hard against my crotch. We’re both hard and panting, desperate for friction. Our groans echo in the bathroom and my temperature is finally back to normal if not higher. I might get a fever later or tomorrow but nothing matters right now except me and him. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I start kissing his ear, his cheek, his whole face except his mouth. He’s panting hard and I’m surprised he hasn’t fallen from carrying me for so long. Realizing I need to help him or he won’t be able to stand tomorrow I take control. ‘Harry, turn around and sit down please’ ‘Okay, just hold on tight’ </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>I nod and lock myself hard around him as he turns around and pushes his back against the tiles. I loosen my legs from around his waist before he slides down the wall and I sit in his lap. Accidently I land on top of his hard-on and we both gasp loudly against each other's lips. I start moving against him, craving friction and a release. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>His fingers find my hole and start to circle around before slowly pushing a finger inside and I hiss at the mixture of pain and pleasure. I squeeze my eyes shut tightly and start to move against his finger. ‘Lou, look at me’ I open my eyes and look at his face, he gives me a small smile and I press my lips to his. I fist my hands in his hair and pull on it, a groan escapes his lips and another finger graces my entrance. I let his tongue slip into my mouth and the other finger makes it through my hole. This time it burns and I accidently bite his lip a little too hard. He hisses and I quickly lick his lip to soothe the sting. I still for a while let the burn soothe before I start to move again. After a while I’m a whimpering pleading mess, begging him to enter me. ‘You sure you wanna do this without lube?’ he pants while I press myself down on his fingers. ‘Yes, please Harry’ I whimper.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He removes his fingers and guides his tip to my hole. I press myself against it letting the head slip through, it stings a little but I ignore the pain and keep pressing myself down inch by inch. We stop kissing and our open mouths rest against each other as the final inch disappears into me. We let out a shaky breath before we return to kissing. I let myself get used to him before starting to move.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>‘Oh my god lou, you feel so good, he moans in my ear’ I keep moving against him and slamming my hips down, I lift my legs so my feet are planted firmly on the floor and I raise and slam my hips right down, this time hitting my prostate and moaning loudly. ‘Jesus fucking christ’ I move faster and soon we’re both a panting and cursing mess.  ‘Fuck lou, I’m gonna come soon’ ‘yeah me too just wait a little’ I slam down on him a final time and we both come violently, I press myself down on him and bite his shoulder from the pleasure ripping through me. Coming down from my high I rest my face on his shoulder. His grip on my hips loosens and my legs fall around him. He’s breathing frantically and his heart’s almost beating out of his chest. I tiredly lift my head to look at him. He’s gorgeous, his head is tilted back against the wall, his puckered lips parted and eyes shut tightly. ‘You’re beautiful, I whisper lightly in his ear’ He doesn’t respond and I know he’s gone away from this world. I raise my hips a little, hissing at him slipping out of me. I remain on my knees as I reach up to grab the shampoo and conditioner. I squirt some shampoo in my hand and start massaging it in his wet curls. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He moans at me tugging a little at his curls and a small smile forms in his face. I wash out the shampoo and apply conditioner. When I’m done I lower my head and kiss his lips.  ‘Haz, we need to wash off and go to sleep’ ‘No, please just a few more minutes’ he whines. ‘Haz, you have a crazy schedule tomorrow, you need to sleep’ I chuckle at his little pout. ‘Ugh fine’ I can’t help but giggle at his cute pouting face. He pecks my lips as we stand up together and wash off before stepping out of the shower. I grab a towel and dry myself before I give it to Harry. We dry off and get our phones from our pockets, glad they're waterproof. We stumble into the bedroom and fall on the bed. I lay on his chest and the previous event hit me. ‘Harry, I’m really sorry for asking that. Truly I am. I don’t know how to fix this but I’ll spend the rest of my life trying’ ‘I forgive you Louis’ ‘You don’t have to do it now Harry, what I said wasn’t okay and you shouldn’t forgive me this fast’ ‘Yes, It’s bad enough that you’ll beat yourself up for this for a very long time, you made a mistake and admitted it. I forgive you Louis, I really do’ ‘I really don’t deserve you’ I whisper into his neck. ‘Oh honey don’t say that, we’ve been through a lot together and I don’t regret it for a second. For the record, no I certainly don’t have any feelings for Mitch, he’s one of my best friends and nothing more. You should’ve seen how they were in the beginning, and Sarah had her talk with him about what he’s allowed to do and not do whilst with the band and on stage, he didn’t go through that to be in love with someone else’ ‘But please just leave it lou honestly, I love you and only you’ I smile brightly and hug him tighter responding with ‘I love you too hazza’ This has been a crazy week and we’re both a bit distressed over the events. Something really fucking bad could’ve happened to him and I could’ve possibly lost him that day. And here I am showing my concern by stirring up a fight. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>We lay in silence for a while just letting the thoughts run around. ‘Haz’ I whisper, breaking the thick silence. ‘Hmm’ he mumbles against my hair. ‘Why didn’t you want to take a break when you were clearly not feeling well’ I whisper into his, hoping not to cause an argument again. ‘I don’t know, I just didn’t want to concern anybody with my sadness. And when you came, I don’t know I just broke. ‘It’s okay, I’d rather have you crying than stuffing it down your throat pretending to be happy when you clearly aren’t’ ‘Thank you’ ‘Always love’ ‘We should sleep’ ‘Yeah, goodnight’ ‘Night, I love you’ ‘I love you too Haz’</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Nobody’s POV</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>In a matter of seconds, the little one with the cheekbones and the prince had fallen asleep, limbs tangled together under the duvet, the rain drowning out the soft snoring. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>
    <em>Chapter 3</em>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <span>7:30 am</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry's POV </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I wake up to the alarm digging it’s way into my head. I groan and shift a little, starting to stretch my legs even though they’re tangled with Louis’. I smile a little as I hug him a little tighter to my chest. I stretch out my arm to stop the alarm and check the clock. 7:30, wow, right on time. Now I’m just gonna spend the next 30 minutes trying to get Louis out of bed. He’s really the least morning person out there but I somehow managed to get him out of bed faster than anyone else. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I wrap both my arms around his tiny shoulders and squeeze gently which results in him pressing himself further into my neck, groaning a little bit and then snoring softly again. ‘Baby we have to get up’ I whisper into his ear. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He responds with a groan which usually means no. ’Yes we do, now come on, I’ll make breakfast’ ’What’s the time’ He asks, my heart doing a little flip at his raspy morning voice. ‘Bout 7:30 love’ ’Sleep’ he mumbles into my neck. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I chuckle lightly and start to detangle my legs from his earning a whimper. I moan a little at the feeling of now being able to stretch out my long legs fully. I start drawing circles on his shoulder and kiss his ear lightly. ’Lou?’ ’Hmm’  ’Wake up love’ ’I’m awake’ ’No you’re not Lou’ ’Yes, see?’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He lifts his tired head, but makes a face and burying it back into my neck. ‘Headache?’ </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He just nods. ‘Aww you poor baby, if we get up we can get some painkillers and tea’ I smile. ‘No sleep’ ‘But today’s Brits darlin’ ‘It can wait’ he protests while hugging me tighter. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I chuckle starting to unwrap him from my arms and moving a little in the dark room. He whines but I refuse to cuddle back with him. I sit up and turn with my feet hitting the soft carpet. I stretch and yawn before standing and walking over to the walk in closet and grabbing boxers and some clothes for the both of us. I get dressed and walk back into the bedroom. Louis’s now hugging a pillow and hasn’t moved an inch. I sit down on his side and stroke his fringe out of his face. ’Lou, come on, let’s get up’ ’No’ he whines hugging the pillow even tighter. ’Yes, if you get dressed now, I’ll carry you down love’ ’Fine’ he huffs playfully. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He finally sits up and stretches his arms and legs. ’Ouch’, a pout and frown appears on his angelic little face.’What is it love?’ I ask trying to hide my smirk, silently knowing very well what he’s pouting about. ‘Hurts’ he mumbles. ‘Sore from yesterday?’ I mumble against his temple, hiding my smirk in his soft hair. ‘Yes, now stop smirking!’ he pouts while leaning into the crook of my neck. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I smile at him, my heart soaring for his cute little morning face. I’m so happy I get to wake up to this. He takes the clothes from my hand and shifts so his feet are pointed at the floor, he’s a little too short to reach the carpet. He gets dressed and I stand up and he wraps himself around me like a Koala bear, exactly the way he did yesterday. I walk us down to the kitchen and place him on the kitchen counter. He pouts when I leave his embrace to make tea but I smile and peck his lips before putting the kettle on the stove. ‘What do you want for breakfast love?’ ‘Pops’ ‘You know you won’t make it far with cocoa pops for breakfast right?’ I turn around and smile lightly ‘Fine then, some eggs too please’ ‘Alright, you want me to make it for you?’ He nods, still rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Before I make breakfast I take out the painkillers and pour a glass with some water giving it to Louis. He takes it with a little smile. ‘It’s good you didn’t get a fever at least, can’t miss the brits now can you?’ I wink. ‘Yes, to sleep I would miss it’ ‘Yeah you would do anything to sleep wouldn’t you?’ I laugh. ‘Wouldn’t miss you handsome in a suit’ I turn away to hide my now slightly pink cheeks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He pouts and I kiss his cute lips, starting to make breakfast. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>20 minutes later we’re sitting in the living room in front of the fireplace, eating our breakfast and drinking tea. ‘When do we have to leave Haz?’ ‘Around 10 ish’ ‘Okay, we leaving together?’ ‘I don’t know, what’d you think?’ ‘I think either works but perhaps separately is better’ he sighs, his sad eyes speak volumes, I wish there was something that could free us completely.  ‘I think it’s best if we leave separately, you can take the rover and I’ll take the Tesla and we’ll meet in my dressing room’ ‘Yeah that sounds good’ </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>We continue to eat the rest of our breakfast and drink tea. Louis’ headache disappears after a while and when the clock turns 9:00 we get up from cuddling on the sofa, placing the dish in the washing machine and making our way upstairs. We pack everything we need before making our way outside to the rover and kiss before saying goodbye for a while. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I walk to the garage getting into the Tesla after calling my sister and telling her I’m on my way there. Since Louis can’t be my date I decided to take my sister. We chat for a bit and then I make my way out the gate and out on the street, turning on the radio, Louis’ song Kill my mind is playing, I turn up the volume and vibe along with it. It’s a kind of short drive to the building but I drive by starbucks and get myself a plain black Coffee to spare Louis sometime before I arrive. As I roll out from starbucks Louis texts me telling me he’s there and already inside. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>When I arrive it’s 10:45, in 15 minutes I’m supposed to be in my dressing room and also meeting up with my mom and sister. I call mom as I take the elevator up rom the parking lot to the dressing rooms. ’Hi mom!’ ’Goodmorning Baby, how are you?’ ’I’m great mom, how are you?’ ’Just fine, we’ll pull up in about 10 minutes okay?’ ’Okay, I’ll see you soon, love you’ ’Love you too’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>When the elevator dings I step out into a hallway and reception, I walk up to the receptionist and introduce myself, she gives me a card to my dressing room and I wish her a good day before taking my bag and making my way to my dressing room. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I slide the card and press down the handle, I open the door with my back with the coffee in one hand and bag in the other. ’Need a hand?’ A voice startles me and I look into the room. In a black couch is Louis sitting and smiling. ’Nah, I’m good’ I walk inside and let the door close itself. ’What are you doing here Lou?’ ’I was waiting for you, our dressing rooms are connected, look’ He points to a door on the left behind me. ’Huh, weird. Anyways when do you have hair and makeup?’ ’6:00 pm, eating at 5:00 pm I think. You?’ ’5:30 pm and eating after that’ ’Nice’ ’So yeah that brings me to the question, why did we get up at 7:30 to be here after 10 when it doesn’t even start until 7:00 pm’ ’Well if you forgot, I have rehearsals in 30 minutes’ ’Ooh yeah, I forgot’ Louis laughs. ’Yeah, which reminds me, mom and Gemma’s gonna be here any minute now’ ’Do they know I’m here?’ ’Nope, decided it would be a surprise’ </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A knocking interrupts and I shush Louis and walk to the door. I open it and out in the hall is my mom and sister with the biggest smiles ever. Mom pushes through the door and engulfs me in a bone crushing hug. When she retreats she looks at me and smiles before kissing me on the cheek. ’Hi honey!’ ’No hug for me?’ Louis interrupts. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Mom spins towards Louis and nearly runs up to him engulfing him in another bone crushing hug. ’Hi love, how are you?’ He asks. ’I’m great, even better now that I get to see both of you together’ ’Surprise’ Louis laughs. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gemma pushes her way through the door and hugs me too before hugging Louis. ’Wow Harry this is quite the lounge room, dark, moody, how much time do you plan on spending here?’ She teases, raising an eyebrow. ’Oh, shush, I want it to be comfy and relaxing. It reminds me of the one direction days’ I shyly look at her and Louis. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They both give me a warm smile and Gemma and mom gives me a tight hug. I sit down beside Louis and wrap him in my arms, suddenly he pushes us both down in a lying position and mumbles ‘sleep’ before locking me in his arms and closing his eyes again. ’No Lou I have rehearsal in 20 minutes’ ’Not my problem’ he yawns into my chest. ’Please?’ I chuckle ’No’ ’Yes baby’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A knock interrupts our cuddling and mom and Gemmas’ chorus of awws and I think they also took some pictures. ’I’ll get it’ mom opens the door a little and outside is a crew member reminding me of rehearsal in 10 minutes. ’I’ll be there in 5!’ I shout before mum shuts the door. ’Lou? I need to go’ ’5 minutes’ ’No, I need to go now’ ’I’ll come with you’ ’You can’t hun’ ’Don’t care’ ’I’ll be quick, ok?’ ’Can I come watch?’ ’Yes’ ’Okay’ ’Come on then, let’s go’ ’Can we come too, please?’  Mom pouts with a small smile ’Yes, you can all come watch but I really need to go now’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Me and Louis get off the couch, I grab a hoodie and we’re out the door. I’m a little worried about us walking together to the stage in case someone might see us. I stop before entering the backstage doors. ’Lou, u sure we can enter together, isn't it better if you guys watch from the audience instead?’ ’No! I agreed with you all morning, it’s not a big deal’ ’Lou, please, I don’t want you to get in trouble’ ’Not happening love, Syco’s getting sued anyways’ ’Exactly what I meant Lou! Don’t poke the bear. It’ll only make the situation worse’ ’No! I don’t care Haz, I’m either going backstage or back home!’ ’Okay calm down, we’ll go backstage’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I give him a smile and quickly squeeze his hand, it was way too early to start fighting. I kept our hands joined as I opened the door backstage, it was like opening the washer machine in action. There are people running right and left, screaming and a stressed crew. A woman was walking towards us and I could feel her burning eyes on our joined hands. ‘Please don’t be another working for Simon’ I silently pleaded in my head. Louis squeezed my hand and gave me a small smile. ’Hi, I’m Percy, you must be Harry?’ She chirped happily. ’Yes, I’m Harry and this is Louis, Gemma and my mom’ ’Nice to meet you all, I’ll be with you for rehearsal and your performance later tonight’ ‘Wonderful’ I smile and we walk through backstage and I try to thank every crew member and staff in sight. After about 30 handshakes later Percy talks me through the entire performance, from sneaking off, to backstage, the performance and then sneaking back. I can feel Louis start to lean on my shoulder and I know he’s getting both bored and tired.  ‘Percy, I apologize for interrupting but could we possibly rehearse the song’, I ask trying not to sound bored. I’m really not, I know I have to listen but Louis, Gemma and my mom are getting tired from standing here and listening. ‘Of course, yeah I’m probably just bantering rubbish anyway’ she laughs calmly.  ‘This way ladies and gents’ she smiles, turns around and starts walking to where I assume the stage is. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Standing on the empty and hollow stage I can’t stop the painful memories from flooding back. A lump forms in my throat but I ignore it and concentrate on the music starting to play. ‘Okay, here we go’ I breathe deeply and sing the first line. Sounds like shit of course, ‘Damn it’. I continue and by now everyone probably hears my voice swaying like the wind. Halfway through the show I sign stop. I just can't take this now, the pain is choking me completely. ‘Harry?’ Louis' worried voice tears through and my eyes fly open. ‘Haz, what’s going on?’  I stare into his beautiful blue eyes, the eyes keeping me sane, but now my heart’s beating the tears my eyes won’t cry. ‘Baby, it’s okay you don’t have to do this’ he cooes softly. ‘Yes I do’ I choke out. ‘No, we can take a short break’ ‘No! I can’t! I took a break yesterday and it turned out shit, I just can’t skip, I need to rehearse just let me do it again! my voice desperate. ‘No Harry! No, you’re not singing again, you can barely even speak! I won’t let you sing’ he scowls harsly while shooting an icy look. My breath hitches and then the air feels thick, it’s getting harder to breath ‘Lou’ I whisper with panic rising behind my eyes. ‘Haz, what’s wrong?’ ‘I - I do - don’t know. My throat is closing up and I’m getting dizzy’ ‘Baby? Come, you need to sit down’  ‘No! I need to rehearse, I’m fine, I just need some water’ I fight back stubbornly. ‘No Harry, you need a break, it’s okay, you know the song perfectly already’ I can see him struggling to keep calm and not force me to sit down or even go back home. ‘NO YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND!’ I snap at him, he flinches and a second of fear flashes before his eyes. I feel a hand on my shoulder and I turn around to meet my mother's worried expression. ‘Hunny, it’s alright to take a breather’ she strokes her hand up and down my arms in a soothing motion. ‘No, mum, no I have to rehearse, the show’s tonight!’ my heart is beating like a train by now and I’m struggling to breathe full breaths. I grip my arms tighter around her forearms. ‘Harry please breathe!’ Both her hands are on my shoulders now and it feels like the air in my lungs is being pressed out by the weight. ‘M- Mu  - Mum I - I *shuddering breath* ‘It’s alright baby, take a breath’ I close my eyes and try to take a big heavy breath. ‘Mum, I - I can’t breathe’ I choke out and finally the tears fall. ‘I know baby, let’s sit down and breathe yeah?’ She tries to guide me towards the stairs to sit down. ‘Nononono this is the first time I’m performing this song and I haven’t been able to get through it even once! I stumble and almost fall, my head dizzy and vision blurry. My chest is moving violently up and down and suddenly Louis yanks me down to sit on the floor. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Louis’s POV </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I knock us both down to the floor and cradle him in my arms. He’s breathing ragged breaths and tears are furiously streaming down his red cheeks. ‘Harry! Harry! Harry! Look at me!’ no response. I look up at Anne and Gemma who’s just as worried as me. ‘He’s going into a panic attack, just get me a water bottle. They scurry away quickly and return just as fast with a water bottle. ‘Okay baby, breathe with me and then we can go back to performing okay?’ I rub his arms and breathe deeply with him. Luckily he calms down without complication and his breathing is soon slow. ‘Water, he croaks. I smile at him and help him sip at the water. ‘U need anything else?’ I ask, nuzzling his cheek. ‘Just you’ he smiles weakly and sinks back into my arms. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>After about 20 minutes he starts shifting and groaning a little. He blinks a little and yawning while looking up at me through his lashes. ‘Hi baby, how you feeling?’ ‘A lot better, thank you’ ‘Always my love, but tomorrow you and I are having one hell of a talk’ I look firmly into his eyes before smiling. ‘Yeah’ he smiles back warmly. The light is back in his eyes which means he’s okay. My heart does a little flip as I kiss his forehead. ‘Let’s get up off the floor before anyone starts to worry too much’ I nudge him a little before we get up off the floor. Harry stumbles a little before he straightens up and apologizes for the worry. ‘I’m sorry for that, it really isn’t anything to worry about, I’m fine, just a lil nervous u know’ he laughs. “My little charmtroll” I smile. ‘Okay then, where were we?’ ‘We’ll just restart from the top’ Percy pipes in. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry gives a thumbs up and I peck his lips before walking down to the audience with Anne and Gemma. This time we take a seat in the very front and I flash him a smile before the music starts again. This time he sings it with confidence, I can still see and hear the pain he’s feeling but he uses it this time instead of pushing it down. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He gives everyone a dimpled smile when the last notes play. We clap furiously before Percy interrupts. ‘That was perfect, do you want to rehearse with the water?’ ‘Yeah, why not, but before we do that, could I maybe go and get some tea?’ ‘Of course, you can get your tea while we fix everything’ ‘Great, Lou care for some tea?’ ‘Yes of course, what kind of question is that’ I laugh. ‘Baby, are you sure you're alright?’ Anne grabs his hands and tugs him towards her, her look is stern but soft. ‘Yes mom, I promise I’m alright’ he smiles warmly but by the look on her face she’s sceptical. ‘Harry- ‘ She warns but he interrupts her before she can continue. ‘Mum, I love you and I promise I’m alright, if I’m not Lou will certainly tell you’ he winks at me before hugging her tightly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>We clasp our hands together and walk towards the lounge room backstage. I can’t stop looking at his face just to make sure he’s okay. ‘Haz?’ ‘Yeah?’ ‘Are you sure you're alright?’ ‘I’m better, but we’ll talk more tomorrow’ ‘Yeah, let’s just focus on tonight okay, you’ll do great, don’t worry’ I hug his arm and push him playfully to the side. ‘Hey!’ He chuckles and nudges my hip. We get to the little lounge room and before I know it Harry gets me inside and I’m pressed up against the door. ‘No Hazza not here’ I whisper in his ear. ‘Just a kiss, please’ He pouts and I can’t help but kiss the sad look off his face. He moans and I slip my tongue inside his mouth. He wraps my legs around his waist and ground into me, groaning at the contact. ‘Haz, we really can’t do this right now’ I pant between kisses. ‘I know, we should stop before somebody catches us’ he says playfully, smirking against my lips.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I lean back from the kiss and rest my forehead against his, we’re both panting heavily and I can’t help but blush at our teenage behaviour. I slide down from his hips but keep my arms around his neck. We kiss a little more before parting and getting our tea. ‘When are you leaving tonight?’ He asks</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Don’t know, don’t really feel like going to the afterparty, what about you?’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘I have to go to the party, I’m sorry’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘It’s ok haz, just come home whenever it’s over, I can’t go anyways. I’ll stay at home and make tea and something, maybe sleep’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Okay, I won’t stay long, probably won’t be able to anyway’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Yeah, please stay sober for me’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Of course I will, only two glasses tonight and that’s it’ </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Good, you can get drunk on me when you come home’ I wink playfully as his mouth falls open. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He doesn’t say anything back so I just take his hand and drag him out of the room back to the stage. Before we go back up I stop and turn around to face him, he’s still staring at me and his pupils are dilated. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘I’ll leave you here so you can calm down, they’ll notice that something’s up with u’ I smile at him and squeeze his hand before leaving him standing outside the door. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Gemma and Anne are chatting with Harry’s band members. I walk up them smiling and just listening to their conversation about tonight. Anne turns to me smiling and asking where Harry is. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘He went to the toilet’ I try not to smirk but I’m obviously failing since she gives me a cheeky smile before going back into the conversation. Damn nothing escapes that woman. I pull out my phone and quickly type ‘ u ok?’ to Harry. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He replies quickly with a ‘no, u bastard’. I giggle a little at the fact that could keep a straight face while he flustered. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Alrighty, should we get back to rehearsing then?’ Percy comes strutting back to the stage.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Where’s Harry?’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘The toilet’ I respond quickly. In the corner of my eye I can see Anne looking suspicious but not saying anything. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘I’ll go look for him’ I offer. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Great and please come back with him, we have to rehearse with the water’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Okay’ I shout quickly before running off to find Harry. I find the toilets pretty quick and walk in. My breath hitches when I see Harry. He’s leaning a little forward by one of the sinks, his head’s down and eyes closed. I swallow hard before walking towards him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Haz?’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘What were you thinking?!’ He snaps up. Now he’s towering over me and It’s suddenly extremely hot in here</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘I- I- Oops?’ Great now I’m stuttering too.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Oops? that wasn’t an accident and you know that damn well’ He looks sternly into my face. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘They need to rehearse the water with you’ I say quickly hoping it’ll save me from the growing tightness in my pants. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Maybe you would’ve thought of that before seducing me then’ His voice is really deep at this point and it’s getting uncomfortable. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Please?’ I choke out.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Please what’ he purrs an inch from my aching lips. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Not answering his question I slam our lips together, moaning at the contact. I fist my hands in his hair, pulling softly at it. I open my mouth letting his tongue slip in. We’re pressed as close as humanly possible and I can’t help but rub myself against him. Suddenly he pulls back and steps away from me. He’s flustered and looking like a complete wreck but smirking at me. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘How long until we’re free?’, he asks with a raw voice causing me to twitch. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Just this rehearsal and then we’re done’ I breathlessly respond. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This time he only nods softly as he walks over to the sink next to me picking up his water bottle. He gives me a peck and in a matter of seconds he’s out the door. ‘Fuck’ I whisper. That man really knows how to turn the tables around. I turn around to look at my reflection in the mirror and except from the swollen lips, rosy cheeks and messed up hair, I look fine. I splash some water in my face and fix my pants before walking out towards the stage. I walk back to the front of the stage where Gemma and Anne are standing listening to Percy instructing Harry how the water and everything’s gonna work. ‘Damn’ tonight’s gonna be one hell of a night. And here I go getting hot again. ‘Damn you hot piece of man’. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Louis are you alright dear, you look a little feverish?’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘I’m just fine Anne thanks’ </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Okay here we go, the last rehearsal!’ Percy interrupts. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Harry turns around to the mic and winks at me before he starts singing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s just as emotional as the other times and I can’t help but let a tear escape, we’ve both been through more than we deserve. He’s been through more than a 16 years old boy should, he’s way too kind hearted to deserve all this. My thoughts are interrupted by a pair of arms wrapping around me. I look to my left and a teary eyed Anne is looking up at me. I crumble a little in her arms and soon I’m wrapped in them, my face in her shoulder and her whispering ‘I know dear, I know’. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘He didn’t deserve it’ I choke out, my tears falling freely.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘And neither did you, none of you boys did’ She’s not crying but I can hear the pain in her eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘But- but I- ‘</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘No dear, no, they did you all terribly wrong, it wasn’t right’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The tears keep rolling down my cheeks as I force myself to believe in her words. I know that she’s right, but I can’t help but blame myself for all the pain Harry’s been through, the teenage life he was robbed from. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Louis dear, listen to me. I know it’s not easy but don’t blame yourself, you’re together now and nothing can stop you from loving each other, focus on each other and you’re love and one day you’ll do what’s right for everyone under their contract, ok?’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She lifts my face in her hands and nods at me, I whisper an ‘ok’ back before turning my attention back to Harry. Wiping my tears off with the cuffs of Harry’s sweatshirt, I can see the tears in his eyes too, the pain lays in his words and my heart aches. My baby is free. I’ll get myself free too, for the sake of our love and other lives under that cagelike contract. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The song ends and Harry quickly wipes his tears and puts a smile on his face. I can see the partly genuine side of it but part of it’s just a facade. My heart’s still aching but I can feel myself smiling. I love that man and I always will, some contract will sure as hell not stop me. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I walk over to the bottom of the stairs and as soon as Harry’s reached the last step I engulf him in a bone-crushing hug. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘It’s alright baby’ I whisper in his ear. He just press his face deeper into my neck, his breaths are short and a little uneven from crying and singing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘You want to rest?’ He nods into my neck and I lift it up forcing him to look at me. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Home or stay here love?’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Home please’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Alright, let’s go home then. Can you drive yourself?’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Yes’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Good then let’s go’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Anne, Gemma, sorry but we’re going home to rest before we have to get ready for tonight, sorry’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘No, you don’t have to apologize, me and Gemma we’ll strutt around and start getting ready soon anyways, you guys go rest, you need it’ She smiles warmly and I can’t help but miss mum, I’m grateful for Anne being an extra mom but nothing can ever replace mum, she was the light of my world. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘We’ll go in the same car we came in okay Lou?’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Yes, let’s go get our things’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Wait Louis hold back a second I want to talk to you’ Anne lightly nips at my arm to hold me back. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Okay, Haz you and Gemma can go grab our stuff to the cars I’ll be down in a second’ Harry just nods and he pecks my lips before leaving with Gemma. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Lou, I know it’s been 4 years since your mom passed away. I also know it hasn’t been very easy for you and your family. I love you like a second son with my entire heart. There’s just always been a special place there for you waiting to be filled. I just want to reassure you that you can talk to me about anything, your story isn’t gonna be easy and you need to know that I’ll be with you in a heartbeat or a phone call. But I never want to replace Jay, she was one of my best friends in the short time we got together. That’s all’ She wipes her tears and smiles quickly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Anne, nothing will ever replace mom, you’re just my second mom and you have a big part just as big and important inside my heart. You’ve done so much for me and can’t ever bear the thought of losing you too. I know me and Haz will have fights, some bigger than others but yes I’ll always talk to you whenever I need to’ I hug her tightly and wipe her tears with my thumbs.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘I love you, I’ll see you soon’ </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Aw, I love you too dear and yes I’ll certainly see you later’ I chuckle before giving her a last hug and we walk towards the car park. Since we parked in different spots we eventually part and by the rover is my dashing boyfriend standing staring into his phone. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Hello, who is you handsome man?’ I ask playfully. He snaps his smiling head up at me quickly stuffing his phone into his pockets. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Sorry but I’m taken’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Bollocks! Well it was nice meeting you anyways’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘You too, I’ll see you around! Bye!’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Bye!’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I chuckle to myself as I hop into the rover. Driving home I blast Harry’s music, windows closed of course. The happiness of knowing that Harry’s all mine filling my heart to the very brim. Suddenly I get the feeling of wanting to cuddle the life outta him. Just laying on our couch and listening to his steady heartbeat. I’m finding myself pressing on the gas a little harder. Butterflies swarm my stomach as I arrive on the driveway. I’m a little earlier than Harry so I hurry out of the car and run into the house. I quickly change into shorts and a t-shirt, put the kettle on and take down our letter mugs. Right as my breaths finally down to normal the door opens and Harry walks inside humming. The second I know his shoes are off I run towards him and jump right up into his arms. He gives a huff as I cling myself to him. I pepper his neck with kisses and nibbling his earlobe. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘What did I do to earn that welcome?’ He chuckles</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Love me’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Always Lou’ </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘The kettle’s on in the kitchen’ I whisper in his ear. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Ooh that’s very nice. You want me to fix tea that you won’t even drink do you?’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Mhm, you’re very smart, has anybody ever told you that?’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘No but thank you' </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He walks us to the kitchen and I’m surprised he can still focus on whatever he’s doing with me kissing his neck like a mad man. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘I’ll make u a cuppa anyway in case you change your mind’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Thank you hunny’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Yes, can you hold on tight for a second and not kiss my neck like a mad man, I need to concentrate’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Nu hu’ I shake my head. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Yes, please Louis, just for one second’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Fiine’ I sigh and stop. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Thanks, love’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His warm arms leave me and I cling to him like a koala. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Just a second Lou, and yes I can feel the disappointment in your body’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>I put my head on his shoulder and close my eyes. I let his heartbeat consume my senses and lull me to a calm state. He starts humming and my heart swells for the hundredth time today. I tighten my hold around him a little bit and he kisses my cheek. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Living room or bedroom?’ He asks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Bedroom’ I murmur into his neck. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Okay here we go, keep your arms and legs wrapped around me really tight and I’ll walk us up’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘No, it’s fine I can walk meself up the stairs’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘But we both know you don’t want to’</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘That might be true.’ I slide down his body and kiss his neck one more time before taking my cup in one hand and his hand in the other and dragging him behind me up the stairs. ‘Woah, someones eager’ He laughs behind me. I smile to myself tugging a little harder on his arm. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I place my teacup on the bedside table and fling myself on the bed. Harry giggles before placing his cup beside mine and lays himself beside me. I cuddle myself into him, pressing my nose into his neck inhaling his flowery scent. I slide my right leg over his waist and he places his left hand in the crook of my leg. I throw the idea a little around in my head before I kiss his neck. He moans quietly and I bite his earlobe earning another moan. I start kissing up his cheekbone, grazing my teeth along it, and kissing my way up to his mouth. When our lips finally touch we both elicit a breathy moan pressing our groins together. Soon enough we’re both panting and humping against each other both desperate for friction. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Haz, please’ </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Please what Lou?’ </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘I need- I need - ugh’</span>
</p><p>
  <span> ‘What baby?’</span>
</p><p>
  <span> ‘Please Haaz’ </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I’m suddenly pressed down on the mattress with Harry towering over me, he’s taking the upper hand and I twitch in my pants at the thought of a dominant Harry. He starts kissing and sucking on my neck, which is probably going to leave a mark or two. I’m a panting moaning mess in his arms. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Ha- Haz pl- please I ugh’ ‘Yes?’ He smirks into the kiss. I bite his lip to earn some control and tug at his shirt ‘Off’. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>I look right into his deep green eyes, getting drunk inside their brightness. He pulls back from the kiss and takes off his shirt and throws it away. He shakes out his beautiful messy curls, my fingers suddenly aching to pull on them. He tugs at the hem of my t-shirt and I quickly sit up to take it off before laying back down and Harry covering my chest with wet kisses. I’m painfully hard at this point and I can’t form a sentence. Pushing my hips up to his he gets what I need, not bothering to ask seducing questions. He rips off my shorts and boxers leaving my flustered body exposed. He kicks off his own trousers and kisses his way back up to my mouth. He keeps on kissing me while reaching for the lube, squirting a generous amount in his palm and starting to massage onto my hole and coat his own erection. He pushes one finger inside to the first knuckle, stopping to let me get used to it. Not long after, he’s pumping three fingers in and out of my hole. I’m squeezing my eyes shut and lifting my hips up to meet his thrusts. He finally does the scissoring motion before lining his tip at my entrance. He connects our lips before entering inch by inch. I hiss at the burning sensation but also at the incredible pleasure. Once he’s fully sheathed inside me he lingers a little longer, letting me get used to the stretch. I lift up my legs and wrap them around his waist digging my heels into his butt ushering him to move. The first thrust sends my head flying backward into the mattress and heaven falls around us. He thrusts again hitting my prostate and making me see stars ‘Ugh oh god Haz’ I pant into his ear. ‘You feel so good Lou’. I buck my hips violently at his thrusts and a warm feeling is starting to grow in the pit of my stomach. ‘Haz..I’m… cl...close’ ‘I know me too’. He thrusts a few more times before pushing in as deep as he can and we both release. My legs slide down from his waist and I nuzzle my head in his sweaty hair. He’s laying on my chest panting completely out of breath. I can feel his ragged breath on my neck. I’m too weak to move so I just let him lay on me until he’s strong enough to move. After a few minutes, his breathing has slowed down to normal but he’s still laying on top of me, I start kissing his cheek and hair and every part of his face that isn’t hidden in my neck. ‘Haz that was amazing’ I whisper with a hoarse voice. He nuzzles his nose further into my neck and doesn’t answer but he doesn’t need to, I already know he feels the same way. Tiredness washes over me and my eyelids feel heavy, I close them and let myself fall into a dreamless sleep. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>As I’m nuzzling Louis’ neck I notice the change in his breathing, it’s much calmer and quiet. He’s fallen asleep, my tired little baby. I pull myself out and up from him not wanting to put dead weight on him while he’s sleeping. I get a towel from the bathroom and dry us both before putting the duvet over him. I walk back into the bathroom and turn on the shower. As I tilt my head back the warm water hits my body and all my muscles relax. I wash my hair and body before stepping out and grabbing a white fluffy towel, drying my hair quickly and wrapping it around my waist. I walk out and into out walk in closet to grab a fresh pair of boxers and shorts. When I’m done I walk into our bedroom stopping just by Louis and admiring him sleeping, he’s just so peaceful and free when he sleeps. Not wanting to wake him up I grab our teamugs with the now cold tea and make my way downstairs into the kitchen. I empty the mugs and put them in the washer machine. I quickly look at the time showing 3:00 pm. My stomach suddenly growls loudly and I remember that we haven’t eaten lunch yet. ‘Shit’ I curse walking to the fridge and quickly looking for something to eat. Nothing, our fridge is literally empty with nothing to eat. ‘Takeaway it is then’, I pull out my phone and quickly call a nearby restaurant. A woman picks up after a few rings. ‘Hello and welcome to Burlington restaurant, my name is Kaylee. How can I help you?’ ‘Hi, I’m Harry, could I please order a Kale salad with chicken and sweetcorn on the side’ ‘Yes, a Kale salad with chicken and sweetcorn, anything else?’ ‘Yes, a spaghetti bolognese please’ ‘Alright, anything to drink with that?’ ‘Just a regular coke please’ ‘Was that all?’ ‘Yes, thank you so much’ ‘No problem, your food will arrive shortly’ ‘Thank you, have a nice day’ ‘You too, Bye’ She hung up. Alright what now i think to myself. I consider waking Louis up since it’s probably gonna take a while to get him up, but on the other hand he’s really exhausted and needs a good nap. I decide against the latter and start making my way upstairs to our bedroom. Seeing him sleep so softly makes me question my choice but I know he needs to get up and shower. I walk over to my side of the bed where he’s laying, snoring softly. I gently sit on the side of the bed and stroke his cheek. ‘Lou’ I whisper gently, now rubbing his back. After a few attempts at whispering his name and no reaction I start kissing his cheek instead, hoping he’ll wake up from it, but of course not. That man sleeps like a baby. I stand up and walk to the other side of the bed, scooting up towards him so that my chest presses against his right side. Him laying on his stomach gives more access to his which I know will wake him up. I start stroking his back again and place soft butterfly kisses between his shoulder blades. Moving upwards to his neck I get a little roucher with my kisses, I find one of his softspots in the middle of his neck and suck down hard. It’ll probably be a hickey once I’m done but he’ll cover it up. At Least it’s turtleneck season unlike last time he wore a turtleneck and it wasn’t even cold outside which the fans obviously caught up on. ‘Lou darling’ He smiles a little at the pet name but remains sleeping. A thought flashes before my eyes and I giggle quietly before setting into action. I dive straight into his neck and bite down on his shoulder before sucking the life out of his neck again. I can feel his body tense up but a moan escapes his slightly parted lips. Proud of my work I lick the now raw and slightly purple spot on his neck earning another moan. ‘Haazz’ he groans, realizing the assault on his neck. ‘Lunch will be here soon luv’ I coo in his ear. ‘Sleep’ He mumbles into the pillow. I smile and kiss his cheek, wandering closer to his lips but not attaching our lips together. Louis starts turning his head out from the pillow but I refuse to kiss his lips. I continue kissing his cheek and around his mouth until he sighs and groans from me teasing. ‘Haaz stop teasing’ I chuckle but still leaves his mouth untouched. ‘Haz seriously, kiss me or leave’ He says trying to sound angry. I hide my smirk and finally give in and  kiss him deeply. I slide my tongue across his lip before pushing it inside his mouth. I moan into his mouth, feeling the warmth of his mouth sends shivers down my spine. And just like that, rosy and aroused I leave him in the bedroom with a smirk. I giggle to myself as I quickly walk down the stairs. The door plings just as I’m in the living room and I go to the front door to get the food. ‘Hi, Harry?’ the delivery boy asks. ‘Yes thank you for that, how much?’ I ask politely. ‘55 pounds sir’. I pull out the cash and give him a tip for being extra nice. ‘Thank you very much, have a nice day’ I smile before closing the door and walk into the kitchen. I abruptly stop when my eyes land on the sight before me. Louis. Not normal Louis. No. Angry and grumpy Louis. Standing in the kitchen in a hoodie, arms crossed against his chest with an angry and grumpy look. ‘Shit’ I curse to myself as I set down the food on the kitchen aisle. I start taking out our food aware of Louis burning holes at the side of my head. I pick out forks, knives and two glasses and pour water in one and the coke in the other. All this without looking at Louis. I know I’m ignoring him and his grumpiness is growing angrier by the minute. I take the food in my hands out into the living room setting it down in front of the tv and then get the remaining things before sitting down on the couch. ‘Coming Lou?’ I ask trying to sound neutral but the smile gives me away. In the corner of my eye I see him stomping like an angry child into the living room and grabs his food sitting as far away from me as possible. ‘Thanks’ He mutters before diving into the fries. ‘Ur welcome luv’ I respond with a smile. I put on the TV and flick through the channels, going across football game after football game Louis still remains silent and eats his food. As I flick further through the channels I come across one where Friends is playing, I decide on it even though I’ve seen it a million times. Louis remains silent until he’s finished his food and brings the trash to the kitchen before walking upstairs again. Still not a word, not even a glance towards me. God, didn’t know he’d choose the silent treatment. I finish my salad and sweetcorn, shut off the TV and bring the trash to the kitchen. I throw it in the bin and place the dish in the dishwasher before making my way upstairs. It’s now 4:15. We need to leave soon. Going into the bedroom I notice my hoodie and his boxers on the floor and the shower running in the background. I walk a little closer but it’s quiet, only the water hitting the tiles’s heard. He’s not even humming which is odd. I decide to leave and go pack a back with things I’ll need. Once I’m finished I change into another outfit. As I step out of the closet, a buttnaked Louis rubbing his hair with towel steps inside. My breath hitches and I stop breathing. Trying not to stare I force myself out of the closet and grab my bag, keys and phone and make my way downstairs dropping the bag off by the door. Lou stomps down the stairs in sweatpants and a hoodie, his phone and keys in hand. He looks so beautiful with his messy hair wet, an oversized hoodie and a pair of sweatpants and of course his black vans. He forced me to buy vans as well and now that’s the only shoes I wear. ‘Which car?’ I ask. ‘Rover’ he mutters back, still grumpy. ‘Alright then, ready to go?’ I ask. He just nods a little and the next second he’s out the door walking towards the rover. I sigh before locking the door and start walking towards the Porsche. As I’m seated in the car, Louis’s already speeding out of the gate. I poked the bear the one day I shouldn’t have and now I’ve made my bed and I’m gonna sleep in it. He won’t budge until later tonight when I arrive home or tomorrow. But tomorrow isn’t a very good day so I’m gonna have to fix it today. Thankfully we’re getting ready in the same room, maybe I’ll have a chance to talk to him then. Curious and slightly worried I decide to call my mom on speaker as I drive through the gate, making sure it closes behind me. Thankfully I forbid paps from standing outside my house and both me and Louis can leave without getting papped and slammed in the magazines tomorrow. A fan might notice but that’s fine with me. After a few rings she finally answers. ‘Hi baby what is it?’ ‘Hi mum, uhm I might’ve made a mistake’ ‘What did you do Harry?’ She asks me in a warning tone. ‘I uhm, I may have poked the bear’ I say a little quieter, afraid of her reaction. ‘HARRY EDWARD STYLES, why would you do that, you know he’s not feeling well since yesterday and earlier today, he’s been through enough already.’ She screams into the phone. I flinch a little at my full name, knowing I’m in deep trouble. ‘I know mum, I’ll fix it I promise, just don’t mind him if he’s grumpy alright?’ ‘I won’t cause I know you caused it’ She simply states into the phone. Well I’m gonna be punished not once, but twice today. What a nice bed you’ve made for yourself Styles, I think to myself. ‘I’m almost there mom, I’ll see you in a bit yeah’ ‘Alright, see ya, kisses’ And she hangs up. ‘Fuck’ I mutter to myself. I pull into the parking ground and park around the same spot as last time and hover myself out. I quickly grab my bag and make it to the elevator. Pushing the button a little too hard I’m on my way up silently hoping Louis’s in my dressing room. The elevator dings open and I walk up to the receptionist. ‘Harry Styles here to check in’ I smile at the women. ‘Yes, go right ahead’ She smiles back at me. I walk fast to my dressing room and push it open, revealing my mom with crossed arms and Gemma in the exact same position, both equally as scary. ‘Hi’ I try. Nope not working. I keep smiling and look around the room, my heart drops at the sight. Louis isn’t here. I look back at my mom and sister and hesitate before asking, ‘Where’s Lou?’. ‘Why should we tell you?’ Gemma hits back with a look that could literally kill me. ‘Cause he’s my boyfriend’ I try, a little confused. ‘Why don’t you call him yourself then?’ ‘He’s not answering my phone’ I sigh. ‘Oh and why’s that?’ Wow that woman can really get on your nerves the exact moment you don’t want her too. I look over pleadingly at mum. ‘Mum, please?’ I ask softly. Worry’s clouding my eyes and I’m getting a little angsty. ‘You put yourself in this position love’ She says softly. ‘See, you messed up bad and now you’ll pay for it Haz’ Gemma smirks. I know it’s unnecessary but I lose it. ‘Oh for god sake just tell me where the fuck he is’ I say frustrated. ‘Jeez, take it easy haz you don’t have to get so upset’ She spits back calmly. Mom looks a little sad and disappointed for some reason. I sigh deeply and close my eyes for a second while pinching the bridge of my nose. ‘I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to lash out at you like that, but I’ve also had a rough week, I know I put myself here, but you’re not exactly helping’ I apologize, sadness lingering in my eyes. ‘Haz, he’s in the other dressing room connected to this’ She nods to a door behind me and I breath out with relief. ‘Thank you’ I walk up and hug her. ‘I’m sorry’ I apologize to both of them kissing their cheek before walking to the door. To my surprise it’s unlocked and I open the door to a cozy, dim lit room with soft music playing. I spot Louis on the black couch, laying on his back, one arm over his eyes. ‘Lou?’ I say softly after closing the door. I silently hope mum and Gemma won’t hear us. Louis doesn’t respond. I sit down on the side of the couch and touch his left leg. Rubbing it a little softly as nonsexual as I can. He removes his arm and looks up at me. I smile a weak smile before he leaves my eyes and remains laying on the couch. Not being able to take it anymore, I throw off my coat and lay down softly on top of him nuzzling his neck. Wrapping my arms around him sadness washes over me for the tenth time today. I don’t want to cry but my emotions are stronger than my willpower at this moment. I let the tears fall from my eyes. I close them and just lay in his arms that are wrapped around me. ‘Lou?’ I try again. Still no answer. I try not to sob but they’re strong enough to wreck through my body and reveal my crying. ‘I’m sorry if I did anything to hurt you Lou’ This time he thankfully responds. ‘Aww baby, no need to cry’ He grabs me tighter while talking softly into my ear. ‘Haz, you didn’t hurt me, I just wanted a little payback for your serenade in the bedroom earlier, I’m not mad at you’ I sob into his neck again, the emotions taking over once again. I’ve really poked and peeled on the wound all day today. Constantly being attacked by sadness. ‘I- I don’t kn- … know why I’m crying, I j- just got s- sad’ I choke out. He rubs circles on my back and whispers soothing things in my ear while I let the tears fall and the sobs wreck through me. A few minutes later the tears have stopped, but I remain in my position in his embrace, my eyes closed and breathing softly into his neck. ‘Hey Haz, we need to start getting ready’ I shake my head a little which he chuckles at. Wrapped up I don’t notice mom and Gemma coming into the room cooing at us. Seeing that everything’s alright they go back into my dressing room and we’re alone. ‘Hazza, we really need to get up, the makeup and hairstylist gonna be here soon.’ I sigh and push into his neck before sitting up and rubbing my tired eyes. ‘Tired’ he asks with a small smile. I nod as a yawn breaks out and Louis chuckles softly. I almost fall back onto the sofa trying to stand up, luckily Louis catches me. I smile softly at him and kiss him lovingly before we walk back to my dressing room. As we enter, so do the hairstylist and makeup artist. ‘Isn’t there anyone else who needs you more than we do’ Louis groans at the makeup artist. ‘Don’t be rude’ I warn him. Gemma and mum laugh a little before welcoming them inside. After 30 minutes we’re both ready to get dressed. I’m wearing Gucci as usual. A dark brown purple ish suit, with light blue dress shirt with a white collar, a purple knitted sweater over, rolled up sleeves so the light blue cuffs are visible, white socks, black Gucci shoes and lastly my rings, pearl necklace and a black silk ribbon pinned on my left side. Louis’s wearing a fitted black burberry suit with a black dress shirt under, black dress shoes and some crazy socks with aliens on them. The clean look is a major upgrade from his previous outfit. Looking at him I’m speechless. I’ve completely lost my words in my mouth. I’m pretty sure my jaw has fallen to the floor. He could really run me over and I'll thank him a million times. ‘Harold you’re drooling’ he smirks at me. ‘Shut up Lou’ I smile back at him still running my eyes all over him, ‘wonder what his butt looks like in that suit’ I wonder to myself. The blush starts creeping up my cheeks and It’s suddenly very hot in here. ‘Stop eyefucking him Harold and come here so we can take pictures of you two’ Gemma laughs. I can hear mum gasp and I shot Gemma a look. We stand beside each other, arms around waists, smiling like dorks into the camera before we pull a serious modeling face on which sadly only lasts for a second and we crack up. I take out my phone and check the time. 6:45. ‘Right on time’ I smile. Louis isn’t walking the red carpet since I am, he’s gonna be inside at his table and wait for the red carpet to end. Which sadly will take a while. I walk to the door and peek my head outside. It’s a little crowded with other celebrities rushing to the red carpet. We won’t be able to walk together. ‘It’s too crowded, we can’t go together Lou’, I smile sadly at him. ‘Me and Lou will go together to our tables and wait there then’ Gemma pipes in. ‘Alright you gorgeous people time to move it’ Mom ushers us on to get out of the room. ‘You can go, we’ll be right behind you’ I say nodding to mom and Gemma. After the door’s closed I slam my lips to his, careful not to mess up his suit or lips. Our long, deep kiss unfortunately ends with us being breathless, almost gasping for air. ‘Go now or I’ll jump on you and we’ll miss everything.’ Louis pokes my hip and pushes me to the door. I throw him a kiss which he “swoonely” catches and stuffs into his pocket before I leave and let the door close softly behind me. I hug mum and Gemma before walking quickly towards the door that leads to the red carpet. While outside a security guard leads me everywhere until I’m in the que to be photographed at the red carpet. Paps and fans are screaming for me to pose this way and that way which I kinda ignore and do it my own way. After paps I stop to talk to fans and get pictures, sign things and thank them before I’m ushered to other celebrities waiting to go inside. I quickly interfere in a conversation with some other celebs. 45 minutes later we’re clear to head inside. We’re all calmy led to our table where Gemma’s sitting with some of my friends. I tried to look for Louis while walking inside but damn that man surely is hid somewhere by the tables. I couldn’t be happier as Lizzo is sat right behind me. Me, Gemma and her start talking about everything and anything just having a laugh. ‘Harry, where’s your husband?’ She asks with a glass of tequila in her hand. ‘He’s somewhere in the room I think’ I smile back at her. ‘Well I’ll try and find him later then’ She laughs and we dive right back into a conversation I’m not really sure what it’s about. Suddenly we’re interrupted by Jack Whitehall's voice. ‘Hello and welcome to the Brits 2020!’ He screams into the mic. The room goes wild for a minute and the show starts. </span>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Small One - Shot</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>This is just a short One-shot. <br/>I imagined Louis winning a Grammy for Two of us and this is basically his speech.</p>
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  <span>Grammy’s 2021</span>
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  <b>(Louis wins an award for Two of us)  </b>
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  <span>‘Death doesn’t let you say goodbye, it rips your souls apart mercilessly and the only thing you can do is scream, cry, fight and end up numb, completely numb. I was ripped from my mother and it broke me, it broke me to the point where I didn’t want to live. I wanted her.’ *Silence* ‘But my sisters, my light, my world and my everything kept me alive, we went through every day, waking up every morning with the slap of death. We survived together. And then we lost our sister. The wound ripped open even bigger and it cut deep, deeper than I ever imagined pain could bore itself. I lost grasp of life again, it got gray and dull. I was hanging on a thread with my other sisters but we braided the strongest braid ever and pulled ourselves back, we pushed ourselves out of the water and up to the surface. I know you’re out here in the crowd and I can’t thank you enough, there isn’t enough love in this world for you women.’ Here we go I thought. ‘In 2017 I was broken but on the road to recovery, life was cruel and I had learned what it can throw at you. 2017 was another dull year. Then in 2018 I got a call. A call that broke me yet again.’ I know Harry’s watching me from backstage right now and it’s a vulnerable topic for him but we both know this needs to come out. ‘His broken cries consumed my dullness, someone broke the other half of my heart. Someone had played him like chess, calculated every single move at his weakest point in life, I caused it and someone took advantage of it. He called me that night, he was wrecked and broken and there was nothing I could do but sit in the darkness and listen to his cries. When he fell asleep 3 hours later I screamed, I screamed at the top of my lungs, mostly in pain but also in regret. I vowed to myself to never let anyone hurt him again, to never tear his heart open again. I also knew that the only one who could do that was me, I vowed to get him back and see him grow and flourish into the man he is today. In 2018 I got him back, we were back in love. I fell in love again. But I still cried at night, over the pain consuming him, drowning him till he couldn’t swim to the surface. No matter how hard I tried I couldn’t pull him up. So I kissed him goodbye and left, for the sake of his wounded heart. A month later I surprised him, I couldn’t breathe when I saw him, the sparkle in his eyes was back and the light had found him again. That night was the happiest night of my life, I thought my heart was gonna explode from love and happiness, and it hurt good hurt.’ *Sigh* I can’t thank enough people for this award, I don’t think I deserve it really’ *Deep shaky sigh* ‘Or maybe I do, at least a small part of it. If I could I’d send an award out to every single fan out there, award after award, to my family but mostly to the love of my life. Being together wasn’t easy but loving was the easiest thing I ever did. but it was also hard. I owe this award to you, to my family, to the boys, to my mother, and to my fans. I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you, which is why I’m asking you all to join me here, up on this stage sharing this award with me.’ The room silent for a second before erupting in screams and applause, people standing left and right. My sisters make their way up the stage, Niall and Liam walk up last both engulfing me in a big hug whispering how proud they are of me. I look around the people standing with me, I smile brightly but my heart drops, he isn’t here. I try to find him backstage but I can’t see him. Suddenly the room goes quiet. My face confused, I look between the boys and my sisters, they’re smiling. The room goes black and silent. I turn around facing the public. Suddenly music starts playing, a light shines upon Kacey as she starts singing. She’s in a gorgeous sparkly rainbow dress the one she wore the night Harry surprised me with the performance. My breath hitches at the realization, my eyes widen as I stare at her, scared for her to finish her part and scared of the disappointment if he isn’t here. The dreadful moment comes to life, she finishes her verse and the room goes black, music still playing. And then his voice consumes the silence of the room. He’s singing straight into my heart, staring into my eyes. I’m glued to my spot as they both move closer and closer to the stage, as he stands before me singing the last verse. staring into my eyes he whispers ‘You’re still the one’ and smiles. The tension building waiting for us to kiss. I smirk lightly and slam my lips to his, wrapping my arms around his neck. We kiss for a minute as the room is consumed in screams louder than ever before. We part, both smiling like idiots, staring into each other's eyes. I divert my attention back to the public and steal the mic from Harrys hands. ‘Thank you’ the screams continue as I raise the award up in the air before walking backstage. Just as I enter backstage a silhouette stops me dead in my tracks. the silhouette hesitates before slowly walking towards me. He stops a few feet away, ‘Hi Louis’. Zayn. I’m frozen and the words get stuck in my throat. I gulp before throwing myself at him, I wrap my arms tightly around his neck, he’s stiff and barely hugs me back. 'I forgave you a long time ago' I whisper in his hair. </span>
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